Smile on my Face
Posted on 05/29/08
I'm a donor who recently found the wonderful woman who chose me from a list 16 years ago. She took the plunge into the unknown a second time and contacted me after finding me on the DSR. I was lucky beyond words to meet her and become acquainted with my daughter and their family and friends.
She had questions. Would I respect her privacy? Did her daughter really want to know her donor-dad at this point in time? Was it too disruptive to their family life?
We're still in the first couple months of knowing each other, but the doubts have given way to trust and the fear has subsided, thanks to humor. It is pretty funny to find out some of our personal quirks and watch our families mix for the first time.
I am sort of shy so it hasn't been that easy. It seems like all of us--my partner included--thrive on learning new things and meeting new people. This may be a secret deeper than the genetic relationship that brought us together. It feels like the farthest thing from science because the outcomes can't be predicted and controlled.
It may sound like I just stepped out of a cave and joined the human race :-) but I guess I'm learning what the mother(s) and dad(s) who raised the children knew from day one: how much people want to show love and celebrate each other.